In a bowl, gently mix cooled cooked rice with 1 tablespoon rice wine vinegar, 1/2 teaspoon sugar, and salt until evenly covered. Press the rice into a parchment-lined 9"x9" baking dish, about 1/2" thick, and press with even weight on top of the rice to compact. Place in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes.
Cut the nori into small strips or rough, irregular pieces. Set aside.
Once firm, cut into approximately 1" squares. Heat 1 tablespoon of oil in a non-stick skillet over medium-high heat. Fry rice cubes until golden brown and crispy, about 3-5 minutes on each side. Remove from the pan to a paper towel-lined plate and set aside.
In a small bowl, mix together the soy sauce, brown sugar, and remaining rice wine vinegar and sugar; set aside. Cut the Spam into 1/2" cubes. Heat 1 tablespoon neutral oil to a skillet over medium-high heat and add the cubed Spam. Cook until well browned and crispy on multiple sides, about 6-8 minutes.
Reduce the heat to medium and add the sauce to the pan, stirring constantly until the Spam in glossy and coated in a sticky glaze. Take care not to burn the sugar. Remove from pan and let cool slightly.
In a mixing bowl, add Zesty Hawaiian Crunch Chopped Salad, including add-ins and dressing, and toss evenly. Divide onto three plates. Top each with 1/3 of the Spam and rice croutons, finishing with sesame seeds, nori, and Sriracha mayo drizzle.